Opinion Blog

Ask a Psychologist

Helping Students Thrive Now

Angela Duckworth and other behavioral-science experts offer advice to teachers based on scientific research. Read more from this blog.

Student Well-Being & Movement Opinion

How to Set a Moral Example for Students: What the Research Shows

What challenging yourself to do better can accomplish
By William Fleeson — September 07, 2022 1 min read
How do I teach students about morality when I'm not perfect?
  • Save to favorites
  • Print

This is the second in a two-part series on morals. You can read the first one here.

How do I teach students about morality when I’m not perfect?

You can turn that concern into a challenge to do better. Here’s something I wrote about the topic for Character Lab as a Tip of the Week:

Studying exceptionally moral people can be hard on the ego.

These people’s lives put me to shame. Dorothy Day, for example, founded the Catholic Worker movement in 1933 to feed and house the poor during the Great Depression; it now serves nearly 200 communities around the world. Protesting injustice, she gave up her freedom for her principles and was jailed for the first time as a teenager and the last time at age 75.

For a while, I was kicking myself for falling short. But at some point, I realized that I can only do my best. It’s just a fact that my best isn’t as good as that of a woman who may be formally canonized.

But how quickly that response can become an excuse for not trying. If we see ourselves as weak, we may let ourselves get away with feeble, half-hearted efforts at morality. How can we accept our limits yet still be inspired by our idols?

Instead of copping out, we can step up. A recent study found that when people engaged in negative self-talk—saying to themselves something like, “Whoa, I screwed that up!"—their performance was mediocre. However, if they immediately followed that negative thought with a challenge—say, “Whoa, I screwed that up, but next time I know I can be better!"—their performance improved.

So when comparing yourself with exceptionally moral people, you can think, “My best is nowhere near as good as Dorothy Day’s best, but my best can become better.”

Don’t give up on behaving morally just because you’re nowhere close to sainthood.

Do challenge yourself to redouble your efforts when you fail to live up to your own principles and encourage the young people in your life to do the same. Tell them what Dorothy Day once said: “Don’t call me a saint—I don’t want to be dismissed that easily.” The moral of the story of Dorothy Day is, simply: We all can do better, if we try.

The opinions expressed in Ask a Psychologist: Helping Students Thrive Now are strictly those of the author(s) and do not reflect the opinions or endorsement of Editorial Projects in Education, or any of its publications.

Events

Teaching Profession K-12 Essentials Forum Supporting the New K-12 Workforce: What Teachers Need to Stay at School
 Join this free virtual event to discover what teachers say they need to feel supported to stay in classrooms for the long haul.
College & Workforce Readiness K-12 Essentials Forum Career and Technical Education Takes Its Next Big Step
Join this free virtual event to hear creative approaches to modernize CTE programs and navigate the shift away from a near-exclusive focus on "college preparedness."

EdWeek Top School Jobs

Teacher Jobs
Search over ten thousand teaching jobs nationwide — elementary, middle, high school and more.
View Jobs
Principal Jobs
Find hundreds of jobs for principals, assistant principals, and other school leadership roles.
View Jobs
Administrator Jobs
Over a thousand district-level jobs: superintendents, directors, more.
View Jobs
Support Staff Jobs
Search thousands of jobs, from paraprofessionals to counselors and more.
View Jobs

Read Next

Student Well-Being & Movement Can AI Help Students Learn Social-Emotional Skills?
Teachers are experimenting with ways to leverage the technology.
5 min read
Empathy02
Chris Cromwell, an instructional technology coordinator for the West Chester Area School District in Pennsylvania, speaks to attendees during his presentation at the ISTELive 26 + ASCD Annual Conference in Orlando, Fla., on July 1, 2026. Cromwell is one of a small but growing number of educators using AI to teach students social and emotional skills.
Marvin Joseph/Education Week
Student Well-Being & Movement Q&A Is SEL a Band-Aid Patching Over Schools' Systemic Problems?
Why schools need to take a hard look at how their decisions heighten student stress.
3 min read
Students embrace Sage, a therapy dog, at Valley View Elementary on April 29, 2026, in Columbia Heights, Minn.
Students embrace a therapy dog at an elementary school in Columbia Heights, Minn., on April 29, 2026. Efforts to help kids improve their social and emotional well-being need to be combined with schools taking a hard look at how they are contributing to high levels of student stress, experts say.
Ellen Schmidt/MinnPost via AP
Student Well-Being & Movement Q&A What Students Lose When Recess Is Squeezed Out of the Schedule
Two professors discuss why recess is not a priority in the education system and equity issues amongst students.
6 min read
20260618 AMX US NEWS HOW 30 MINUTES RECESS COULD 1 LA
First and 2nd graders play during a mid-morning recess at William F. Prisk Elementary School in Long Beach, Calif. on May 20, 2026 . The American Academy of Pediatrics recently updated its recess recommendations this year for the first time in 13 years, recommending a minimum of 20 minutes of recess daily.
Genaro Molina/Los Angeles Times
Student Well-Being & Movement 'Anxious Generation' Author Jonathan Haidt and Others Tackle Tech Overuse
An EdWeek forum explored creative solutions to encourage students to move away from screens and devices.
4 min read
A student uses a cell phone after unlocking the pouch that secures it from use during the school day at Bayside Academy, Aug. 16, 2024, in San Mateo, Calif.
A student uses a cell phone after unlocking the pouch that secures it from use during the school day at Bayside Academy in San Mateo, Calif., on Aug. 16, 2024.
Lea Suzuki/San Francisco Chronicle via AP