We live in a world of instant gratification. Want a new shirt? Amazon will deliver it tomorrow. Feel like watching your favorite TV series? Turn on Netflix; no waiting until next week. Craving a Big Mac? Tap your DoorDash app.
It’s no wonder early education teachers report that their young students are having a harder time with impulse control than in years past. Children are, after all, living in the same world as adults—where it’s easy to sidestep opportunities for practicing one’s ability to pause and think before acting.
“When we were kids, we didn’t have a really cool device you could do something with all the time to occupy yourself. We had to wait a lot with nothing to do,” said Emily Bartz, a learning specialist at Friends School of Baltimore, a private Quaker school serving grades pre-K through 12, and an independent education consultant. “Kids today don’t do boredom very well.”
Impulse control, or response inhibition, along with flexibility and emotional control, make up the key executive function skills. Aptly described by experts as “the air traffic control system of the mind,” these skills help us plan, focus, and act on instructions.
And they took a “hit” during the pandemic, according to a 2026 report that analyzed data from Harvard’s Early Learning Study. Based on teachers’ reports, young students’ executive function skills have yet to recover. Experts aren’t surprised.
“I think the curriculum has become more academic, so we’re expecting different behaviors of kids than we used to, especially at the early stages, pre-K and kindergarten,” said Peg Dawson, a child psychologist and co-author of several books, including The Smart But Scattered Guide to Success: How to Use Your Brain’s Executive Skills to Keep Up, Stay Calm, and Get Organized at Work and at Home.
Dawson recalls when her mother, who taught kindergarten in the 1970s, expected students to be able to name the letters of the alphabet by the end of kindergarten. Now, many kindergarten programs aim for students to be reading by then, she says.
“That requires more concentration, more sitting still, more focus, and, unfortunately, it sort of flies in the face of what kids at that age really want to be doing, which is playing and moving,” Dawson said.
Teachers can’t change the curriculum they have to teach or control what happens at home. But they can help young students learn how to better control their impulses, Bartz said, who advises against negative reinforcement, like constant reminders to “stop” or “slow down” or “wait.”
“I just try to make it fun for the teachers,” Bartz said. “I tell them, ‘You should not be giving kindergartners directions that dead people can do, like: ‘Don’t talk, sit still, don’t move.’ ... What can you do instead? Dead people cannot say their ABCs in their head four times.”
Below are seven strategies Bartz shares with early education teachers to help their students learn impulse control, along with these tips for implementation:
- Choose one at a time—don’t introduce all of them at once.
- Model it first.
- Practice it as a class.
- Use the name of the strategy and the skill it builds.
What to tell students: “When I want to shout out or grab, I whisper ‘whoa’ to myself, just like stopping a horse.”
How to teach it: Teach it as a game first: the class gallops in place and everyone whispers “whoa” to stop. Then connect it to the moments when students want to blurt out or grab something or someone.
When a student uses it: “Jaden, I heard you whisper ‘whoa’ before you called out. Really great response inhibition!”
What to tell students: “When I feel like doing something fast, I picture a big red stop sign. I stop, and then I choose.”
How to teach it: Tape small stop signs to students’ desks or place a big stop sign in front of the classroom. Tell students to look at the sign or quietly tap the sign as a cue when the urge comes to call out without raising your hand or grab something that a classmate is using.
When a student uses it: “I saw you look at your stop sign and wait, Maya. You stopped and then you chose, that’s exactly how it works!”
What to tell students: “When I have a great idea and it isn’t my turn, I hold it in my fist and raise my hand.”
How to teach it: Model “catching” your own idea in your fist and holding it until it is your turn.
When a student uses it: “You were holding that idea so tight, Matteo. Now it’s your turn—let it go! What was it?”
What to tell students: “When my hands want to grab or push, I squeeze them together tight and count to 5. Then I let go.”
How to teach it: Practice squeeze, hold, and release as a class. It gives students’ energy somewhere to go, which helps those who grab or push when they are excited or frustrated.
When students use it: “Sophia, I saw your hands squeezing instead of grabbing the blocks. That was really hard and you did it!”
What to tell students: “When I have to sit and listen, I give my hands a job, like holding my fidget.”
How to teach it: Decide with students which fidgets (toys designed to help children focus) are OK at the rug and at tables, and practice using them so they remain a tool for listening.
When a student uses it: “Your hands had a job during the story, Leo, and your ears were listening the whole time. Nice work!”
What to tell students: “When I feel too fast, I move in slow motion like a snail or like I’m walking through water.”
How to teach it: Play slow-motion walking as a game, and use it for transitions when bodies are revved up, like coming in from recess.
When a student uses it: “Everybody slow-mo to the rug! Wow, Isabella, that was the slowest snail walk I’ve ever seen.”
What to tell students: “I only talk when I’m holding the talking object. When it’s not my turn, I listen.”
How to teach it: A talking stick, a small stuffed animal, or a pretend microphone in morning circle makes turns something students can see and hold.
When a student uses it: “You waited until the microphone came to you, Liam. That is response inhibition!”
Emily Bartz, a Baltimore-based learning specialist and consultant, developed these executive function strategies based on the teachings of psychologists Peg Dawson and Richard Guare.
Images: Canva
