Down With Detention!

Imagine that you overslept one day and arrived at work two minutes late. Or, perhaps you made a serious mistake on the job: You forgot to bring the PowerPoint slide show that your team was scheduled to present at an important meeting; you became involved in a heated argument with an obnoxious co-worker who has been harassing you for weeks; you argued with your supervisor over a menial chore; you drank four cocktails at lunch because you learned that your spouse intends to leave you; you took a much-needed mental-health day and bumped into your boss’s sister on the golf course.

You’re busted. Your supervisor hustles you down the hall to the human-resources office, where an officious person orders you to sit in an empty conference room for an hour—or four hours—or for four hours a day for three days. The length of time you must sit depends upon the severity of your infraction and how much your supervisor likes (or dislikes) you. You are not permitted to argue or defend your behavior, and you are guilty until proven innocent. You have zero options. You do not get to make a phone call. And if you do not cooperate, you may be sent home for three days without pay. If you want to keep your job, you must sit in that empty room, staring at the walls, while your fellow workers receive valuable training that they will use to perform important work functions in the future. You will not be permitted to make up the training, but your supervisor may give you a quick summary when you return to work. However, you will be expected to be able to perform the newly required tasks as effectively as your fellow employees can or you risk being demoted, censured, or fired.

This scenario sounds absurd, doesn’t it? It is illogical, inhumane, and it doesn’t address the reason for your particular problem behavior. And it certainly wouldn’t motivate you to do your best work for your company. It might motivate you to dust off your résumé or quit on the spot. Because you can quit, and because you do have rights, employers must treat you humanely and decently if they expect you...

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