In response to recent reports surrounding the further spread of KIPP, the Threat Awareness Office at the Department of Homeland Security has just posted the following adjustments to the National Hype Warning System. Hold onto your bags:

KIPP Is Our Savior
NCLB Has Destroyed / Saved Our Schools

National Standards
Universal PreK For All (get it?)

Bring On The Growth Models
The HPV Vaccine Will Promote Sexual Activity

“Human Capital” Is Where It’s At (Teachers, Principals)

The 65 Percent Solution (A Bad Dream?)
Pedophiles and Stalkers On MySpace (& Other Techno-Fearmongering)
For previous editions of the HWS from last spring and summer, look here, here, and (more generally) here.